Mental Health: How to Ask for Support

Identifying your mental health concerns

If conversations about mental health are new to you, it can be hard to know what you need help with. For example, you may feel down or depressed. Or stress may be leading to anxiety. You can get a stronger sense of your mental health with many tools. One good tool to start with is an online mental health screen through Mental Health America at screening.mhanational.org.

Think about your feelings and actions. You may benefit from seeking professional support if you:

• Feel sad for long periods of time without a clear reason.

• Have racing thoughts.

• Have unpredictable mood changes.

• Do things that interfere with your relationships, work, or school.

• Self-harm through behaviors such as cutting.

• Withdraw from loved ones or social activities you once enjoyed.

• Have hallucinations or feel things that aren’t real.

• Notice changes in your sex drive or sexual activity.

• Notice changes in your eating or sleeping patterns.

When you need help now

Seek help now if you have thoughts of harming yourself or others. Call or text 988 or 800-273-TALK (800-273-8255) right away. You will be connected to the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. An online chat option is also available. This service is free and available 24/7.

How to start the conversation

No matter where you are in your mental health journey, getting help can seem intimidating. You may not know where to start or what to say. But whether or not you decide to see a therapist, it may be a good idea to begin by talking with a loved one.

When speaking with a friend or family member about your mental health, it’s important to:

• Choose a low-stress moment. This conversation is important to you. Don’t try to have it while your loved one is busy with other things. Ask if they have time to talk to you without distractions.

• Be direct and clear. It’s tempting to downplay your feelings when talking about them. For example, you may want to make sure your loved one doesn’t worry too much about you. But you should be open, honest, and transparent about what’s going on.

• Think about what you want from the conversation. Try writing down notes or goals beforehand. When talking, let your loved one know what you would like from them. Knowing how they can help will make them more present.

• Research and share useful information. Infographics, videos, and articles can all help explain your experiences.

• Have the conversation via text. If talking about these issues in-person is too overwhelming, text messages or email can be a great alternative.

• Manage your expectations. Mental health problems can be hard to grasp. Your loved one might not understand at first. It may take multiple conversations before you feel that your loved one has really heard you.

If you feel uncomfortable or awkward talking about your feelings, that’s okay. The important thing is to be honest. Remember that you have chosen to confide in this person for a reason.

Treatment options

You’ll likely have questions when it comes to what types of treatment are available. You might wonder about what kind of help you need or who should you ask. Maybe you need guidance on how to talk about your experiences. The good news: There are different kinds of treatment options available.

First, decide how serious your symptoms are. Are they disrupting your day-to-day life? For some, this can mean difficulties with work or school. Or it can mean withdrawing from your friends and family. If your symptoms are affecting your life in a significant way:

• Research treatment options. For instance, cognitive-behavioral therapy may help. This treatment has been proven to improve depression, anxiety, substance use problems, and other mental health illnesses.

• Find a therapist or counselor. Most insurance company websites have portals for you to search for therapists or counselors in their network.

• Use resources from organizations such as the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) or Mental Health America (MHA). MHA’s interactive tool can find support that is right for you. Go to https://mhanational.org/finding-help-when-to-get-it-and-where-to-go to try it.

• Ask for help. Text 435748 (HELP4U) or Call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for free, confidential information. services, and support located in your area from SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service Administration) National Helpline. It's available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

If you don’t have health insurance, you can still get help. Many therapists or counselors will work with you on a pay scale so that what you pay is based on your income. You can also consider:

• Online therapy. This may cost less than going to see an in-person mental health professional.

• Visiting a local college or university. They may offer mental health services at a reduced rate even if you aren’t a student.

• Clinical trials. Some or all of your care will be free, and you may have access to new medicines. Visit www.nimh.nih.gov/health/trials to read more about clinical trials.

• Checking out a local community health center. These centers often provide free or affordable care.

If you feel that you are a danger to yourself or others, there are more immediate steps you should take. You can:

• Call or text 988 for the 24/7 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.

• Call 911.

• Go to the nearest hospital emergency room.

• Look at inpatient options at local hospitals.

Support—of many different kinds—does exist for you. And while you may feel alone, many other people share experiences like yours. Talking through your issues is a great way to not only help yourself, but also to show others that it’s okay to ask for help when you need it.